Monday, 9 September 2013

School girl disguised as a Pastry Chef

"We do NOT tolerate lateness at this school."  Warned the director.

Do you remember your first day at school?  Your parents waving you goodbye by the gates as your mum called, "Don't forget to eat your sandwich!" and your dad smiled "There's my brave girl."

Well, it was like that for me today.  Except without the parents or the sandwich.

Tomorrow I've got Art in the morning and Science in the afternoon.  And the day after I have English in the morning and Technology in the afternoon.  And you know what?  I have never been so excited to start school.  Because despite my form teacher telling us that we all need to behave ourselves and cooperate with one another, I can't wait to bring my pencils in to school for the first drawing lesson.


Let me clarify: One of the criteria of the patisserie diploma is that our "entremet" (frozen dessert) is perfectly decorated for the judges.  So for this, we will be having art classes.

In order to understand emulsion and what happens to cream at such a temperature and why, we will have "applied science".  We're also having health and safety lessons and law and economics for business.

I told my teacher today that there was no need for me to have English lessons.  I am English.  She looked at me and told me in her thick French accent:  "Oui, mais, Yoo maye weesh to sweetch to anozzer class, however I will bee organizeeng many outeengs and trips, visiteeng Michelak's patisserie and maybee wee weell get a chance meet him."  I stopped, gobsmacked.  I LOVE SCHOOL TRIPS.  And Michalak?  HE IS THE PATISSERIE SEX-GOD OF FRANCE.

I was also told that we will get a chance to compete in competitions, such as "the best apprentice."  And WHO DOESN'T LOVE A COMPETITION.




Letter addressed to all apprentices:

Mademoiselle, Sir,

Regarding the terms and conditions of the something something, and as an employee, we would like to kindly remind you that it is forbidden to use mobile phones and walkmen or wear caps or hoodies in the building.

In order to preserve the cleanliness of the walls and floors of the building, all food and drink must be consumed in the canteen.

Any students caught smoking in the school will be put through an immediate interrogation.

Thank you Sir, Mademoiselle and allow us to assure you our very best wishes,

The Director

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Please bear with me today, fellow blog-reader.  Despite being overwhelmed after my first day of school I am also over-tired. Similarly to how Angelina Jolie is both an assassin and a trustworthy wife in Mr and Mrs Smith, I am a patisserie chef disguised as a school girl.  Or vice-versa.  I have had an intense week of early starts and raspberry tarts.  And yes, I did make that rhyme up on purpose.

These are photos of the patisseries we have been making this week:







Paris is beautiful